Like I’ve said before, I’m only human and I’m terrible with patience. I kinda got myself pretty down today about our whole situation because I want a baby so bad. I always have high hopes when it comes to things and set myself up for disappointment when it doesn’t turn out how I think in my mind. I want this to work out and I won’t stop until it does.

So we have around 7 days left of the T-shirt fundraiser and have sold 16 shirts, the profit is at $71. I know there’s still a few people that still have yet to get their shirts but I honestly thought we would have gotten close to our goal of 100 already(damn my high hopes). So now on to thinking of the NEXT fundraisers. A few ideas we’ve thrown around are: A cake bingo, a car wash, a puzzle piece fundraiser and have a few friends/family collect change. Who knows, we may have to do all of them.. Our adoption fund(all that WE have put into, no other help) is at $1,300. That’s a long way away from our goal of $6,000(that’s $4,700 from it to be exact). Ya’ll. This is incredibly small compared to the whole cost of anywhere from $25,000-$40,000! We have no papers signed or anything because we have to have $3,736 to BEGIN. And please, I really do appreciate peoples concerns and slight pushes to go the “cheaper” route but the way we are going is the way it will be. Once we get to the point of picking an agency to go thru we will deal with the debt that comes with financing and applying for loans and grants. I’m scared that we will have to wait even more years to be able to have a baby in our home. It’s just such an emotional roller-coaster lately and it’s been a while since I’ve been in this emotional boat. So forgive me if i seem like I’m complaining…it’s just how I cope with my feelings because if I hold it in, it always makes it worse.

And I’ve run out of stuff to say…also it’s time for bed. I felt the need to post something to keep it current. I’d like to post one every few days. Well, goodnight and God bless.